We’ve updated our Terms of Use to reflect our new entity name and address. You can review the changes here.
We’ve updated our Terms of Use. You can review the changes here.

Welcome to Cuddle Country, Pardner!

by Negative Øhio

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1.
Are you looking for trouble? Because if so you're in the wrong place, pardner But if you're looking for a mattress With 100% comfort guaranteed at an affordable rate... YOU'VE COME TO THE RIGHT PLACE! WELCOME TO CUDDLE COUNTRY, PARDNER! WE HAVE ON SALE: A 100% REAL IMITATION MAHOGANY MATTRESS ALL YOURS FOR 500 BUCKS THAT'S 500 SHOTGUN SHELLS! (Wow! I just happen to have exactly that many shotgun shells In my pants pockets!) IT'S ALL YOURS MY FRIEND! (Wow!) -Six Hours Later- Aah, this is so comfortable I wonder what kind of strange, wonderful dreams I'll have Sleeping on this mattress ZzzZzzZzzZzz
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[Intro] Whoo-ee! (Wow-ow-ow-ow-ow!) Whoo-ee, whoo-ee! Dog, diggity doo, dee doo, ooh hoo! That's what I'm talkin' about, yeah! Ow, my feet Ah! (Ah) [Sample 0] Just cum ;) [Sample 1] Built for helpful comfort (Stay under the blanket) [Sample 2] We have on sale: A 100% real imitation mahogany mattress [Sample 3] What would you do if your bed was too short And your bepis refused to stay under the blanket? Well, I'd buy me a mattress long enough for all of me to stay in bed And have wood build up a six inches longer than regular For 6.21€ of extra cost Well I have a lot of extra money Oh ho, you make it so easy for me! Just cum ;) [Sample 4] It's all yours for 500 bucks That's 500 shotgun shells [Sample 5] It's all yours, my friend! [Sample 6] Imitation mahogany mattress It's all yours for 500 bucks That's 500 shotgun shells [Sample 7] Well I'll be Are you preparing baked calves for breakfast? ;)
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[Intro] Pumpkin pie and roasted spleen, milk and bread and gasoline (hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey) Doesn’t matter what I see (hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey) I just know I gotta eat YOUR FOOOOOOOOOOOOD!!! [Verse 1] Those burnt waffles smell real nice I’d like some with some gelatin and fishcakes on Ho ho! I don’t need an invitation, I can walk through your walls Breakfast table buffet, with cereal and meat balls That stuff on your plate isn’t gonna eat itself I crave for some blood pudding, I can’t mistake that scent! [Verse 2] The graveyard shift has left me hungry as heck I crave some toasted fruit as a healthy sneck Don’t be scared, I’m just deadly peckish Ha. Ha. Ha. Ha. It seems the kitchen has been cleaned out Maybe there's some stuff behind the trash can Oh look! Some prime rotten cabbage! Ha ha ha! Ha ha ha! Uh, so like, umm *ahem* Are you, uh... gonna finish that? Maybe? [Interlude] Hah! Uh-hah! Ha ha ha ha ha heh ha ha ha Heh heh ha heh heh Heh heh ha heh ho heh Hah heh ho heh hah heh ho AH! Gimme some toast! Gimme some bratwurst! [Breakdown] Oh no, it seems somebody has left the fridge unlocked I better take with me all this cheese and ketchup before they go to bed Om nom nom nom Barbecued macaroni Frozen pastrami Pickled salami Fermented iced tea!? Boiled salad dressing (hey that sounds dope) Sun-dried calamari [Outro] Hmph! When you’re out of normal ingredients, you gotta improvise Let’s see what they have in the rest of this house for some brunch Yeah! Fine shoe soles with garlic relish Deep fried ferns with mozzarella Silken curtains with salt and jelly Smoked carpet with shaving cream Delicious garbage bag pie Kitty litter mixed in a stir fry Smartphone circuitry pasta salad You can’t be too picky when you’re a phantasma [Ending] Why would there be a ghost in the fridge!?
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[Vers 1] Æ e så lei av skjitpratet ditt Hold kjæft din jævla Quisling Fremmedfrykt e ulogisk ondskap Hatpratera burde alle sperres inne [Refreng 1] Livstid for rasistan [Vers 2] Breiviks disipla e fortsatt på frifot Bur dem inne og hiv vekk nøkkelan Islamofoba e alle nazista Og nazista skal vi ikke tollerer [Refreng 2] Livstid for nazistan [Bro] Det e alltid høyreekstreme som terroriser norge Bombinga av Blitz, Utøya og Quisling-regime Fan ta dæ! Du må ikke fan tru på dem når de sir at innvandring e farlig Snikislamisering og kulturel marxisme e bare vrøvel Fan ta dæ! [Refreng 3] Livstid for rasistan Livstid for nazistan Livstid for ho Sylvi Livstid for ho Hege [Vers 3] Ytringsfrihet blir brukt som et våpen Svake menneska styrt av latterlig frykt Koffør trur du at flyktningan flykta? Dette e ikke en invasjon [Breakdown] Bruk sunn fornuft Bruk sunn fornuft [Outro] Ikke la frykten styr dæ Ikke la frykten styr dæ Ikke la frykten styr dæ Ikke la frykten styr dæ Ikke stem på brunt parti Ikke stem på brunt parti Ikke stem på brunt parti Ikke stem på brunt parti
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Because of the obvious threat To untold numbers of citizens And because of the crisis Which is even now developing This radio station will remain on the air Day and night This station and 100's of other radio and TV stations Throughout this part of the country Are pooling their resources Through an emergency network hookup To keep you informed of all developments At this hour, we repeat These are the facts as we know them: There is a pandemic There is a pandemic There is a pandemic There is a pandemic There is a pandemic (use your brain) There is a pandemic (wear a mask) There is a pandemic (use your brain) There is a pandemic (wear a mask) We repeat These are the facts as we know them: There is a pandemic We repeat These are the facts as we know them: There is a pandemic We repeat These are the facts as we know them: There is a pandemic We repeat These are the facts as we know them: There is a pandemic These are the facts These are the facts These are the facts These are the facts These are the facts These are the facts These are the facts Because of the obvious threat To untold numbers of citizens And because of the crisis Which is even now developing Use your brain Wear a mask Use your brain Wear a mask Use your brain Wear a mask There is a pandemic Because of the obvious threat To untold numbers of citizens And because of the crisis Which is even now developing Use your brain Wear a mask Because of the obvious threat To untold numbers of citizens And because of the crisis Which is even now developing Use your brain Wear a mask Because of the obvious threat To untold numbers of citizens And because of the crisis Which is even now developing Use your brain Wear a mask Use your brain Wear a mask Use your brain Wear a mask Use your brain Wear a mask
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Aaaaah, god my eye! Agh, god why, why?! Uuuugh, grawwww! Aaaah! Ugh, okay, okay, just... just one more eye Just one more eye Just... just... I need... I just need to put it in the other eye Oh god, okay, okay Oof, oof, oof! Okay, one... two... three.. AAAAAAAAGHHHH GODDDD AAAAAAAGGHHHHHHH RAAAAGHH AAAAAAGHH Ugh, ugh, AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA
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[Intro] Eeehehehehehe! [Verse] They call me the horrible voice witch ‘Cause my voice gives chills to them all They don’t know I’m actually a nice witch ‘Cause they always hang up when I call I try to give cookies to the children They run away in fear instead Claiming that I’m trying to eat them And that my baked goods are made from human remains I ask if I can join the karaoke club Instead of microphones they bring a torch When I drink wine they think I’m a vampire Crosses and garlic they all toss When I dust off my back porch They cover their chimneys with spikes Even when I feed my tiny cat They demand me to take a hike [Chorus] Don’t call me bitch I’m just a nice witch But now I’m pissed Because of your horseshit Don’t call me bitch I’m just a nice witch But now I’m pissed Because of your horseshit [Breakdown] You know what? No more misses nice witch I’m gonna curse you all…out! Fuck you! Fuck you! Fuck you! Fuck you! I’ll tell you where to shove that fucking lighter fluid Up yours! Up yours! Up yours! Up yours! You judgemental goddamn horse cocks, can’t you all just fucking Piss off! Piss off! Piss off! Piss off! Oh I'm sorry, am I being rude? Then stop fucking try to light me on fire! Shit fuck! Shit fuck! Shit fuck! Shit fuck! Close-minded fuckers gonna go to Hell! [Chorus] Don’t call me bitch I’m just a nice witch But now I’m pissed Because of your horseshit Don’t call me bitch I’m just a nice witch But now I’m pissed Because of your horseshit [Outro] Fuck!
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[Verse 1] Yuck! I wanted to be the sickest one around That combined both Gore and Pornogrind But when I try to write any lyrics down My bowels can’t take it, no they can’t take it Erotic cannibals makes me want to puke As my belly’s innards come up like a nuke [Verse 2] Yuck! I got the disembowelment blues This music is too gross, I must refuse My stomach acid’s not for show But right now it just has to go out Followed by my guts and other organs I’m not gonna feel good in the morning [Harmonica & Sax Solos] I got the disembowelment blues! Disembowelment blues! Ugh... Oh no... Disembowelment blues! Disembowelment blues! Oh no... Ugh, oh god... Oh no... [Ukulele Solo] Yuck! Ugh, oh no... My stomach, oh no... Oh my guts... Oh no... Ugh... Ewww... This shit is nasty Oh no... Look at that stomach acid fly! Oh no! Oh... ewww... [Outro 1] Just thinking about this thing... Ugh, I can’t… *vomit sounds for 50 hours* (Well I’m glad you got that out of your system) You know what, I changed my mind (WHA-) [Dicky Dick's Puke Fountain] It’s like a thousand knives in my belly Blood and gall splatting around like jelly Stomach is churning and burning and exerting Vomit corrodes the underwear Buttocks exposed to acid rain Deluge of puke, money-shot on your face Ralphing on your Laurens turns me on You’re spewing back at me and my mind’s gone I feel like I’m dying, Freudian style Timothy’s blood drips in my eye Cut me open like an apple pie Then recreate the food scene from Witchcraft 8 [Outro 2] You're turned on by THIS!? (crowd of disgusted onlookers)
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[Verse 1] In these darkened woods, with evil lurking deep You will bear witness to the greatest tragedy As you find yourself in this forsaken place There’s no hope to surrender, there’s no hope to escape You can try to run and hide But the dogs will find you anyway [Breakdown 1] ooooooOOOoooo, give us pets! OwO we just want to play with you! ^u^ give us lots of attention! >w< it’ll make you happy, too! :) [Sax Solo 1] [Buildup 1] GGGGWRRRRRRRRR oooooOOOOOOoooo! :) [Interlude 1] so sorry if we scared you! >w< we’re not used to company! uwu but it’s nice of you to stop by! ^o^ you really made our day! :) [Verse 2] As you can plainly see, the dogs are fond of you They follow you around these darkened woods and outside, too You walk out of the forest, the whole pack by your side You want to take them with you, but it’s time to say goodbye! [Buildup 2] noooooooo! :( GGGGWWWWRRRRR oooooOOOOOOoooo! :( [Interlude 2] You can’t raise a pack of wild dogs When you live in the city There’s no room in your apartment And you know they’d be happier outside Happier outside! [Sax Solo 2] [Outro] The greatest tragedy of all Is meeting a pack of adorable dogs And realizing you can’t take them home with you
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[Intro] It all started when his marriage failed SQUAAAAACK!!! [Verse - 1:35] While it was revolutionary for its time Citizen Kane has not aged particularly well There’s no arc explaining how he lost his innocence Simply skips over his entire childhood in a flash To cram in more of a boring storytelling gimmick The beginning of the film spoils the rest Everything else ends up as a tedious recap The middle of the movie especially drags on To the point where you might fall asleep Then suddenly, the parrot jumpscare appears [Breakdown - 1:54] Why not just trim the film? Why add in a random jumpscare? It has nothing to do with anything Literally added to wake up the audience We all got trolled by Orson Welles As his parrot laughs in our face Rosebud, ugh *Film Twitter* [Verse - 2:54] The movie also works too hard to humanize a fascist Seen shaking hands with Hitler Treated as forgivable just because he changed his mind Implications of antisemitism never explored [Verse - 3:31] The lack of clear condemnation has lead to a misaimed fandom With fürher 45 idolizing Charles Foster Kane And white leftists today keep trying to convert the nazis A platform is what they crave, they’re not going to sway What about the women he abused? What about the workers that he fucked over? Does an innocent childhood somehow make it forgivable? Old white man circlejerk commence Bree, bree, bree, bree, bree Bree, bree, bree, bree, bree Bree, bree, bree, bree, bree Boo! [Verse - 4:28] We’re not saying the film is worthless or without merit Simply that classic works show their cracks with age And if society keeps holding these works up on a pedestal Critiquing their problematic elements has to be done And when nobody else does, we have to do it ourselves Even if we’re not movie critics [Verse - 5:17] Nothing is flawless, nothing is pure Perfection is meaningless, perfection is meaningless Art reflects the time and place it was produced in Think when you consume, think when you consume Nothing is flawless, nothing is pure Perfection is meaningless, perfection is meaningless Artistic relevance might fade with time Think when you consume And analyze the way the story applies today [Breakdown - 7:02] No sympathy for the wealthy Fortunes are made with blood Kane died alone without a soul It is what he deserved [Outro - 8:13] All in all its hard to go back to Citizen Kane The biting satire now seems toothless with age And the screenplay is not Welles’ best work in hindsight 2 out of 5 stars, would not recommend And also it’s mainly achieved the status of “greatest film of all time” Due to being an American export to a USSR-friendly European film scene Meaning it gained popularity for right-wing reasons despite being a supposed left-wing movie But that’s a story for another time Enough with the past! (Don’t let nostalgia blind you) Enough with the past! (Don’t let nostalgia blind you) Enough with the past! (Don’t let nostalgia blind you) Enough with the past! (Don’t let nostalgia blind you) Enough with the past! [Outro - 8:54] Enough with the past! Enough with the past! Enough with the past! Enough with the past! Enough!
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[Intro] AAAAAAAAAAAHHH!!! [Outro] *Applause* Now, one inexpensive turret Just flip the turret Then snipe and shoot 50 shots One, two, three: shoot! Then snipe and shoot 79 shots One, two, three: shoot!
13.
Die! Fire! Fire! Fire! Fire! Danger... Danger... Danger... danger... Fire! Danger... Danger... Danger... danger... Put out the fire! We must get ready There are two kinds of attack With warning, and without any warning You know what to do Get ready Without any warning... Die! We must obey the atomic bomb We hope it never comes How can we tell when the atomic bomb may explode? Yes, we must all get ready now! We must obey the atomic bomb So we know how to save ourselves We must obey the atomic bomb Without any warning... It explodes It's a bomb! Duck and cover! It is such a big explosion Smashing buildings and knock sign boards over And break windows all over town Help protect us from the atomic bomb Danger... danger... Fire! Then, you're on your own There once existed a planet known as Earth But Earth exploded! Total destruction... Wake up! Wake up! Wake up! Wake up! WAKE UP!!! WAKE UP!!!
14.
Hi, welcome to Cuddle Country, pardner! We have this 50% imitation mahogany mattress On sale, right now (Ooh, how much is it?) Its 500 shotgun shells, that's right 500 bucks (No, too much) What? This isn't a haggle, you know (No, tell you what: Give me 50 dollars, and the mattress is mine) What? (Yeah, you heard me) Uuummm Well I'm not able to sell this thing otherwise So might as well Here is 50 bucks (Ooo, it is mine, wow!) -SIX HOURS LATER- (Aahhh, wonder what kind of wonderful dreams I'll have, wow ZzZzZ ZzZzZ ZzZzZ)
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Faen, hetes det opp til debatt igjen? *sukk* Vi e ikke en debatt, vi e menneska som vil lev et fullverdig liv Forskninga e på vår side, men fortsatt har vi latterlige debatta Vårt kjønn e ikke en sinnslidelse, og vi har eksistert sia tidenes morgen Gamle konservative hold sæ fast til utdatert informasjon Frykta for fremtida gir dem motivasjon til hat Så alt vi kan si e: Fuck NRK Fuck Solvangs mangel på ryggrad Fuck Jenny Klinge Fuck Senterpartiet Fuck TERFs Fuck Christina Ellingsen Fuck Womens Declaration Fuck feilkjønning Fuck Glenn-Peter Sætre Fuck Espen Ottosen Fuck Norsk Luthersk Misjonssamband Fuck KRF Fuck Partiet De Kristne Fuck Pål Surén Fuck Klassekampen Fuck Dagbladet Fuck konverteringsterapi Fuck nazistan Fuck FRP også, når vi først e i gang Ja til tredje kjønn Ja til transrettighetea Ja til ikke-binæres rettigheta Ja til menneskerettigheta Ja til oppdatert vitenskap Ja til inklusiv feminisme Ja til hormona for alle som treng dem Stop diskrimineringa nu! Stop, vær så snill
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[Dope Turtle] This is hemp seed, be careful how you use it [Nark Horse] And we must stand united on this You can do it by bringing about compulsory education Because it is only through enlightenment... [Dope Turtle] A dense and shady crop, weed... [Nark Horse] It exists in almost every city and hamlet in the country [Dope Turtle] In the Old Kentucky River Mill at Frankfort, Kentucky... [Nark Horse] It might be interesting and important for you to know Some of the methods used in bringing these drugs into the country [Dope Turtle] For to grow hemp legally You must have a federal registration and tax stamp [Nark Horse] The weed marijuana is growing in every state in the union [Dope Turtle] In Kentucky hemp harvest comes in August Here the old standby has been the Self-Rake Reefer Which has been used for a generation or more [Nark Horse] Recently, in the city of Brooklyn, New York A field of marijuana was found behind a tenement court [Dope Turtle] Here's one harvester, at least That doesn't stall on the heaviest hemp [Nark Horse] The weed was here being cultivated, regularly stripped [Dope Turtle] The hemp is about ready to be take up and bind into bundles It is bound by hand, the hemp itself makes a good band [Nark Horse] And dried and sold in schools [Dope Turtle] Thus hemp, cannabis sativa, is staging a strong comeback [Nark Horse] And at government army posts [Dope Turtle] Rope for marine rigging and toeing For hay forks, derricks, and heavy-duty tackle [Nark Horse] The sale of marijuana is even more difficult to detect and halt [Dope Turtle] For to grow hemp legally You must have a federal registration and tax stamp [Nark Horse] They are hidden in fake jewelry cases In the heels of shoes [Dope Turtle] Thread for shoes for millions of American soldiers [Nark Horse] Hollowed shaving brushes are another medium Books with false centers are often used Watch cases are convenient hiding places [Dope Turtle] Hemp for countless naval uses, both on ship and shore Victory for hemp Victory for hemp Victory for hemp Victory for hemp Victory for hemp Dead as a dodo
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Marinecore 04:17
Down Sinking Underneath Going lower and lower in the water Down Sinking in water Down, down, down I can't swim I can't swim Waves grab me Down, down Dragging me down below I can't escape from the water alive Pulling me lower Oh I can't swim Why did I go on that boat? That was a stupid idea Why did I go on that boat? I don't know I never should have gone away from dry land On that boat Why did I run from stable land? On that boat Ooo Oh no Help! Was I forsaken? I don't wake Death was the only friend there to me Bree, bree bree bree Bree, bree bree bree Bree, bree bree bree Bree, bree bree bree Bree, bree bree bree Bree, bree bree bree Bree, bree bree bree Bree, bree bree bree AAAHHH!!! Ooh Oh Bree bree bree bree bree bree bree bree No Open up my eyes, I go lower still I can't get out of here Sinking, they bury me alive I go down I go down I go down I go down I go down Further down I finally drown My carcass rot away on the ocean ground On the ground Where crabs Feast on my flesh Om nom nom Om nom nom Om nom nom Om nom nom Om nom nom Om nom nom Om nom nom Om nom nom
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Did you know That there are 3000 people living inside your nose? And when you sneeze, they all escape? But eventually, they will return to the great nostrils Your sinuses a sanctuary from the rain outside With no reason to run away from your snout Though with every drip, another one wants out Before the sniffle brings them back home As they say, home is where the pharynx is Though beware, if they dig for gold Pickaxes and drills burrow into your flesh Before long, your nose starts to bleed And when you bleed, they all escape
24.
Korleis er kvifor? Kvifor er korleis? Korleis er kvifor? Kvifor er korleis? Korleis er kvifor? Kvifor er korleis? Korleis er kvifor? Kvifor er korleis? Korleis er kvifor? Kvifor er korleis? Korleis er kvifor? Kvifor er korleis? Korleis er kvifor? Kvifor er korleis? Korleis er kvifor? Kvifor er korleis? Korleis er kvifor? Kvifor er korleis? Korleis er kvifor? Kvifor er korleis? Korleis er kvifor? Kvifor er korleis? Korleis er kvifor? Kvifor er korleis? Korleis er kvifor? Kvifor er korleis? Korleis er kvifor? Kvifor er korleis? Korleis er kvifor? Kvifor er korleis? Korleis er kvifor? Kvifor er korleis? Korleis er kvifor? Kvifor er korleis? Korleis er kvifor? Kvifor er korleis? Korleis er kvifor? Kvifor er korleis? Korleis er kvifor? Kvifor er korleis? Korleis er kvifor? Kvifor er korleis? Korleis er kvifor? Kvifor er korleis? Korleis er kvifor? Kvifor er korleis? Korleis er kvifor? Kvifor er korleis? Korleis er kvifor? Kvifor er korleis? Korleis er kvifor? Kvifor er korleis? Korleis er kvifor? Kvifor er korleis? Korleis er kvifor? Kvifor er korleis? Korleis er kvifor? Kvifor er korleis? Korleis er kvifor? Kvifor er korleis? Korleis er kvifor? Kvifor er korleis? Korleis er kvifor? Kvifor er korleis? Korleis er kvifor? Kvifor er korleis? Korleis er kvifor? Kvifor er korleis? Korleis er kvifor? Kvifor er korleis? Korleis er kvifor? Kvifor er korleis? Korleis er kvifor? Kvifor er korleis? Korleis er kvifor? Kvifor er korleis? Korleis er kvifor? Kvifor er korleis? Korleis er kvifor? Kvifor er korleis? Korleis er kvifor? Kvifor er korleis? Korleis er kvifor? Kvifor er korleis? Korleis er kvifor? Kvifor er korleis? Korleis er kvifor? Kvifor er korleis?
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[Outro] Wow, that was a weird dream You were there, and you were there, and you were there And that will be 50 dollars for being in my dream (What? Eeyh? Huh? What in tarnation?) Yeah GIMME

about

Howdy pardner! You ready for a rootin' tootin' good time with some experimental music? I sure am! YEEEHAW!

Bedside A consists primarily of Avant-Garde Metal bangers, while Bedside B consists mainly of freeform experimental jams.

credits

released September 23, 2022

Composed, produced, written, performed and made by Gigakoops and Nightmare Lyre.

Additional personnel:
YMRED - Vocals, guitar (track 3)
Sky - Guitar, clarinet (track 17)
NXP - Drill recording (track 22)
Swift the Fox - Ukulele (track 19)
A shiny fox - Vocals (track 24)

Sample credits on individual song pages

Special thanks to YMRED, Sky, NXP, Strangerous, May S., MCSMeister, Fenrik U. Synlig, Jaxon, Julie Amalie, Atle Skift, chelsea shopping from the ground, smudgedaslug, MasochisticGoat, the streamers who have showcased our songs, and the rest of our friends and family.

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